godfather

Chapter 51

Jealousy and vindictiveness because of the partner's old love in the past is a boring thing that men are most passionate about.Meng Xiaobei had neither the opportunity nor the qualification to ask his godfather for the past ten years, the period of Shaotang's most youthful, vigorous and turbulent desire, and he missed it.At that time, he himself was still a child with no knowledge of personnel, he was still squatting in the family compound, taking pictures of foreign paintings and playing with mud. With two pieces of red on his face, he wiped his nose on his sleeves. Shaotang was already a well-off and popular bachelor in the Xigou army. .

He has grown up, grown strong, handsome and oily, and the little dad is slowly getting older, and the traces of time have left such a sharp contrast.

Meng Xiaobei refused to let it go, and rubbed Shaotang in the office for a long while that day.He is crazy and obsessed, he can't wait to use his fingers and teeth to imprint his own imprint on the opponent's whole body, to make up for the more than ten years of good times that have passed.

Shaotang was kissed by Xiao Bei from the back to the back of the neck and the line of the spine, turned his head calmly, broke his chin, kissed him deeply, and even commanded in his ear with a low and hoarse voice, "Baby, hand!" Give it a little more effort, and give it a good time."

"How happy? I won't." Meng Xiaobei blew into Shaotang's ear.

"No?" The corner of Shaotang's mouth twitched.

"No, your man taught you."

Shaotang turned over suddenly, hugged his thighs, and neatly countered and pressed his son against the table, almost hitting the glass plate.Meng Xiaobei fell back and quickly lay down. As soon as the ground became hot, his vitals were caught completely, and his eyes immediately became confused.Shaotang's hands were thick and heavy, and the delicate wrapping of palm prints made Meng Xiaobei tremble.Shaotang's brows and eyes were dark and focused, and the instant oppressive rubbing quickly crushed and destroyed Meng Xiaobei's sanity and resistance.When Shaotang slowed down, he breathed more lightly, and when Shaotang moved quickly, he was in a mess all of a sudden, and in the end he almost suffered from hypoglycemia and fell into the opponent's palm...

Meng Xiaobei gradually realized that since the beginning of the relationship between the two of them, the thing on the bed has been like this.Shaotang tolerated and tacitly allowed him to indulge him as much as he wanted and do whatever he wanted, but Shaotang was the one who grasped the direction and steered the relationship between the two of them, and he could move up and down, advance and retreat freely.Sometimes a stern look, a movement, or a word from Shaotang can make Meng Xiaobei treat himself like a god with trepidation, trepidation, and endless aftertaste.Of course, Shaotang's seductive and handsome smile can make him go crazy.

……

Shaotang and Xiaobei went to a certain bathing pool near Nanchizi Street in the city by chance.In addition to the men's and women's showers, there is also a bathing pool connected to the men's shower room, which is quite large, [-] square meters square.Female customers would not like to soak in this kind of bath, because they think it is dirty and messy. There are only middle-aged or elderly men here, and they soak here during the day or at night.

Shaotang went in naked and naked, but he insisted that Meng Xiaobei wear shorts, so that the bird could not be exposed.

There are many people sitting by the pool.There was a man with his feet on the shoulders of another man, and the fat on his crotch drooped openly, and the man repaired the calluses on his feet.Others put hot towels on their heads, leaned against the edge of the pool with their eyes closed, and remained motionless.Meng Xiaobei also saw two men, each occupying one side of the pool and staring at each other, their eyes were different, they didn't seem to know each other at first.One of them slowly paddled to the other's side, chatted for a while with the white steam steaming in the bathing pool and the blurred vision, and then swam across the pool like a pair of wild ducks in tandem and landed. , went to the locker room...

This is the second half of the 80s, the social atmosphere is gradually liberalized, and the emerging trend of love, freedom, sex, and innocence deeply shakes the city.At that time, the Haidian Military Region, the Xicheng government compound, the streets and alleys in the city, and the university campus... the social crowd that had been suppressed for 20 years seemed to be a monolith, and shocking lines seemed to be slowly chapped from the middle, and there was a wave of restlessness everywhere.

Movie theaters began to release a series of youth love movies. In the TV dramas, the male and female protagonists flirted and kissed openly. Hong Kong and Taiwan pornographic videos with tulle covering their delicate bodies can be seen everywhere in video stores. James Dean cigarettes are posted on the walls of college students’ dorms Posters on motorcycles... It was a golden age of freedom of thought and self-awareness.Even so, same-sex love and sex are always taboos hidden in the most secret corners of the city.

Parks, toilets, bathhouses.

This is the fringe zone that belongs to this group of people.

Shaotang stayed close to Meng Xiaobei from the beginning to the end, taking a bath next to each other, and glanced at the crowd indifferently.On the way, someone came over, touched Shaotang's shoulder with his fingers, and struck up a conversation.Shaotang's expression was indifferent, and he liked to ignore him, which meant: I have a companion, don't bother me.

Shaotang took Meng Xiaobei there once, and never went there again, and told Meng Xiaobei, "Don't go to this kind of place alone to play in the future."

Meng Xiaobei asked: "Are they... the same kind of people as us?"

Shaotang looked at Meng Xiaobei, and corrected him very seriously: "We are different from them, you are not 'that kind of person', and you don't want to be in that circle. You will understand when you grow up, don't mess around, understand?"

There used to be an "exhibitionist" near their middle school. The man was wrapped in a cotton coat in winter. When he met a little boy, he ran over and threw his clothes off at him. He was actually naked inside.The boy yelled "Catch the gangster" and "Hit him, beat him!"Two security guards at the gate of the school ran over with sticks in their hands. Meng Xiaobei and Qi Liang happened to see them, and picked up their schoolbags to help them go up and beat up the gangsters... The man ran away later. If he was caught and turned over to the police station, maybe You should be convicted of indecent assault by a hooligan.

In public men's restrooms in many places, Meng Xiaobei saw ambiguous code words more than once, and even small yellow pictures drawn in the corners of the walls and above the urinals with charcoal briquettes.In the densely populated areas of Beijing, there are public toilets in several places. After nightfall, they are well-known "joint" places for doing those things.Everything exists and proceeds in darkness, reflecting a gloomy light that is completely incompatible and inharmonious with the bright side of society...

At that time, Meng Xiaobei also felt curious, hesitant, restless, and lacked a sense of security; a boy in his teens who hadn't experienced much in the world felt confused about his own sexuality, identity, and future from the bottom of his heart.He is well aware that he is not the same sexuality as most people in society, and he is not even the same as "them".He doesn't mix in the circle where the light can't be seen, he doesn't change partners every now and then, he only has one partner, Shaotang, but he likes a man after all.

Qi Liang once quietly told Meng Xiaobei: "Xiao Yi has a boyfriend."

Meng Xiaobei asked, "How do you know?"

Qi Liang said: "I came home from school for two consecutive days, and I watched him from behind. He was riding a bicycle side by side with a man, and turned in that direction at the intersection of Dongdaqiao, which is the direction of his home."

Meng Xiaobei didn't take it seriously, and said, "If he rides a bike with a man, you can call him a boyfriend, and we still cuddle and sleep in the same bed all day long."

Qi Liang said firmly: "It must be, I think there is something wrong with his eyes, that man seems to be the teacher of the school next door!"

"Damn it, he actually saw one and liked the other, Zhen Lang."

"At the beginning when he saw the two of us, he also had the same kind of expression full of enthusiasm - he went to find someone else in a blink of an eye!"

Qi Liang whispered, showing displeasure.

Meng Xiaobei narrowed his eyes: "Why do I seem to hear... the tone of being reluctant to let go of old love?"

Qi Liang made a straight face, and resentfully said: "I can't forget the ghost of the old relationship!!"

Meng Xiaobei exclaimed: "If you really like Teacher Xiao, go and confess to him! My dad and I voted for you, and I voted for him!!"

During the winter vacation, Meng Xiaobei and Qi Liang secretly went to Dongdan Park because they couldn't restrain their strong curiosity.

This is a park in the middle of the street similar to their Balizhuang Red Scarf Park. There is no entrance fee. The park is usually unmanned and covered by trees and grass.Qi Liang heard from Mr. Xiao that this place is where half of Beijing city people gather to make friends.

Meng Xiaobei asked, why would Xiao Yi tell you this? !

Qi Liang said nonchalantly, I just asked him, where do you usually go shopping, I will also go and see!

There were not many people on the street in the cold winter of March [-]th, and the park was a little deserted, but walking along the stone path, Meng Xiaobei saw that he was wearing a cotton coat in twos and threes to keep out the cold. man.On a bench, there are men lying on the other's lap, some snuggle up quietly, some play chess with their heads together, and some are squeezed one behind the other, sneaking into the small bushes by the side of the road...

Meng Xiaobei later came to Dongdan Park more than once, and every time he could see that fat middle-aged man lying on the stone bench, his eyes were slightly gentle and charming, and he spoke slowly to everyone, neither in a hurry nor annoyed , very well-educated, but every time he sleeps on a different man's lap.They're just looking for company in the park.

Qi Liang pointed to the grove: "Do you want to go in or not?"

Meng Xiaobei stopped, and said cautiously: "We two? Will you not be misunderstood that I will go to the rolling tree pit with you?"

Qi Liang trembled and said: "We are together, and it happens to be misunderstood that we are a couple. I am afraid of being 'questioned' by others!"

Meng Xiaobei put his mind to one side: "...I also want to go in and have a look!"

The small forest is a big downhill, the loess road, the cypress branches are criss-crossed, the tree pits are scattered with toilet paper, and occasionally condoms.There are no condom vending machines that can be seen everywhere on the street, and many people are reluctant to spend money to buy condoms, and more often use toilet paper...

Behind the bushes, there was a man's heavy panting, and the unique sound of physical impact.Hearing that voice made Meng Xiaobei's heart beat wildly, throbbing, and embarrassed, because the movement sounded familiar to him, and he understood it.

Half of his head suddenly appeared from behind the tree, with a pair of red eyes, he asked harshly, "What are you looking at?... Do you want to come too?"

Qi Liang's ears turned red, and he almost tripped into a tree pit.

Meng Xiaobei held Qi Liang's arm, aren't these people too cold?The man yelled arrogantly, "Everyone go outside and line up, today is mine"!Feeling guilty, Meng Xiaobei hurriedly dragged Qi Liang away...

Not long after, Meng Xiaobei came again alone.

He didn't come here to find a partner, and he definitely didn't have that kind of flirtatious idea.

He is almost an adult, and he is also beginning to think about his future life path.At that time, Meng Xiaobei felt an inexplicable uneasiness, maybe he wanted to come to this kind of place to explore the secrets of emotions and find the lost direction.His feelings, the sex he experienced and tasted, he couldn't communicate with his family and anyone around him, except Qi Liang.This emotional darkness and closure made him restless, wandering like a lonely soul on the edge of his peer group.He was not originally an autistic boy, he was very uncomfortable, and he also hoped to have fellow travelers.

Coming to a place like Dongdan Park made him feel at ease and safe.Many people here are like him, his "kind", even worse than him, without even a regular partner.No one treats anyone differently here, there is no insult or discrimination, many people even like Meng Xiaobei very much and are interested in him, because it is rare for a handsome young man in fashionable clothes to break into this park!

"Beautiful girl, come here! Chat with my sister!"

A fat man lying on a stone bench greeted him with a smile.

These regular visitors in the park have nicknames for each other.Those who are older and have seniority in Dongdan Park are called "sister".Sister Hu, Sister Ming... Another example is this slightly fat and pleasant-looking uncle, who is called "Sister Lotus" in the park.It seems that because this person's surname is Lan, he entered the garden and called himself Lan Caihe, and over time everyone called him Sister Hehua.

Sister Hehua handed over the cigarette, and Meng Xiaobei said, "Smoke mine", and set her on fire.

Sister Hehua asked: "Pretty girl, are you a student? I saw you come here a few times, have you found a pleasing companion?"

Meng Xiaobei said frankly: "I'm not looking for someone, I have a boyfriend. Also, don't call me 'sister', it sounds awkward! Did you call me pretty boy!"

Sister Hehua burst out laughing: "Hahaha, I'm quite shy! Don't worry, I won't bully you, pretty boy!"

Meng Xiaobei sat a foot away from the other party, smoking a cigarette coolly, and would never let Lan Caihe rest on his lap or touch him.Sister Lotus asked: "You and your boyfriend, are you going to be 1 or 0?"

Meng Xiaobei understood immediately: "...I'm the one above, count as 1, how about you?"

He actually did it once, when the bird entered the nest.

Sister He Hua took a deep look at him, without concealing it: "I'm only looking for someone I like, but after so many years, when I meet someone I really like, I can do 1 or 0."

Meng Xiaobei deeply agrees with this statement. When he meets someone he really likes, he doesn't mind being up or down. He has imagined countless times in his heart what it would be like for Shaotang to be with him...

He looked puzzled and asked, "How many friends have you made?"

Sister He Hua asked back: "Little boy, are you asking about the one who slept with or the one who really loved and lived together?"

Meng Xiaobei struggled with his thoughts for a long time, and finally asked, "...will we get AIDS?"

Sister Hehua had a slightly sentimental and sad kiss, and said lightly: "I have been in Dongcheng for more than ten years. Among the people I know in this garden, three of them walked away with sores all over their bodies. Look at the pillars of the small pavilion over there. Engraved with their names."

"I carved it for them."

Sister Lotus added.

Meng Xiaobei fell into deep thought with a serious expression, Fat Lotus hurriedly comforted him: "You have a regular companion, don't touch people outside, you will definitely not get sick, don't worry too much!"

The two also casually chatted about other things. Fat Hehua was a nice person, not overly lewd and obscene, so Meng Xiaobei was willing to talk to this person.Sister Hehua also raised her hand to point out to Meng Xiaobei that our people called this open space of stone slabs a "small square", a place for chatting and making friends; There is a feng shui place where men's doubles practice bliss; there is also a large public toilet not far away, called the "office", and it is also a place where comrades do business in the dark and get wild and high.

Sister He Hua asked: "Your boyfriend is also a student like you?"

Meng Xiaobei shook his head: "He is older than me."

"Ten years older."

Meng Xiaobei directly tampered with the person in his heart to look younger, and subconsciously understood that the age difference between him and Shaotang by fourteen or fifteen years sounded like a fantasy to outsiders.

Sister He Hua was stunned for a while: "He is much older than you, so you are willing to be with him? Have you thought it through?... You didn't let an old man fool you, don't you?!"

"No!" Meng Xiaobei quickly explained: "We have known each other since we were young. He is very kind to me. He is my dearest person. I have liked him for many years, and he also told me that he loves me. "

"He's also handsome."

"We're pretty much in love."

Meng Xiaobei said the word "love" very unashamedly, whenever he talked about his little dad, the corners of his mouth could not help but turn up, his eyes filled with tenderness.The boy's unique delicacy and gentleness melted into the narrow eyelids, and there was light in the eyes, and the true emotions could not be concealed.

Sister Hehua's gesture of knocking the cigarette ash was slightly feminine, and she nodded: "Little boy, you are so lucky to be among people like us...you should cherish it."

As a result, on this day, when He Shaotang came back to Grandma Meng's house, he didn't see Meng Xiaobei for the first time. Where's the baby?

He was out in the winter vacation and didn't wait for him to take a vacation at home?

Shaotang walked around the street near the No. [-] factory, scanned the entrance of a game hall with his poisonous eyes, and quickly found that Qi Liang and Shen Dawei were playing games there, but his son was missing.

Just as Shaotang was about to step in, he paused for a moment, then came out again, and called Qi Liang from the public phone in the small shop next door.The rich second-generation million-dollar household is also equipped with a pager, and is always in the forefront of his peers.

Shaotang shouted: [Call sign 18256.Where is my son?Why don't you go home? 】

After a while, he saw Qi Liang running out of the game hall in a hurry, and called him back from the same public phone!

Captain He, who was originally a scout, was hiding behind a big tree ten meters away, wearing sunglasses and a suede jacket, smoking quietly.He can't tell what kind of subtle thoughts he has, maybe it's a common problem of a 30-year-old man in love when facing his little lover: he also lacks a sense of security, is sensitive and suspicious, and his desire to protect overwhelms all reactionary forces. He wants to master everything about Meng Xiaobei, and wants Xiaobei to be by his side all the time.

Soon, the message was displayed on Shaotang's pager, and the lines in the code could reveal a bright and consistent flattering tone: [Uncle!We are outside, playing games, we must go home at night! 】

Shaotang bit the cigarette butt fiercely, and cursed vaguely: My day.

If I can let go of this heart, then I don't care about Bei Bei.

Shaotang took out a cigarette and put it between his lips, wanting to light it up, he flicked the lighter in his hand, flicked it on the ground a few times, and rolled it into the gap of the iron grate of the sewer on the street!Shaotang chopped a few feet around the iron grate, his eyes turned red and his complexion suddenly sank because the smoke was not enough to smoke, he felt that this was an ominous matter, where did Beibei go? !

Really want to be with me?

together forever?

love me?

……

His Beibei is on the difficult road of growing up. Shaotang is a father and also a lover. Every small step Meng Xiaobei takes forward seems to be a heart-pounding expectation for him. and torment.